The trap of abuse was threefold:
1. Fear: I did not love the abuser but I was afraid of being alone; I could feel my life was going into a downward spiral with him but I was afraid of ending up alone homeless with my newborn if I left him
2. Threats: the manipulator threatened me to stop providing money for the rent and the grocery shopping if I did not do what he wanted
3. Intense stress: I lived periods of very intense stress because fear and threats were associated with lack of sleep. It is very difficult to have a clear and sharp mind when the physical body is exhausted.