When he left me I was so disappointed. I was also angry because I had so many things to tell him that I was never able to say because it was so abrupt.
Then sadness and grief overwhelmed me. However I never felt one bit of hatred towards him. I loved him and still do. My love for him is simply going to morph into a nice memory so I can be totally available for a man who, contrary to him, wants to be with me.
All these mixed feelings post break-up are in sharp contrast to what I felt when the relationship with the perpetrator ended. Back then, I felt relief to be in a safe place at last. Then indifference towards him.
I am aware of the pain involved when a man we love left us my friend my sister. Nevertheless, sadness and anger are only the other side of love. Which proves that love did exist at some point in the past. And trust me, this is far better than the pain involved in an abusive relationship when love never once entered the picture.
I feel the absence of the man I loved so deeply, I miss him so much. But I loved him. I think he did too at some point. Love is what matters. I wouldn’t trade this kind of man and ex for anything else.