My second baby was born 2 months before his due date. I did not expect this, although in hindsight I had a terrible pregnancy because of the abuse.
The first thing I said to him was: “My baby you are so beautiful“. He could not breathe so he was taken away from me at birth and I only got to see him 4 hours afterwards, covered in tubes at the intensive care unit.
I want to say to you my friend my sister that your premature baby can become the radiant child he is born to be. I want to hold your hand and whisper in your ear that all is well, you are a good mummy, your baby will thrive and become a beautiful sun.
I would like to thank all midwives from the bottom of my heart.
I was lucky to give birth in the United Kingdom, where it is easier for independent midwives to help women give birth at home, contrary to France.
I created a playlist dedicated to home birth on youtube called “Homebirth Series” available here.
Melissa, the independent midwife who followed me during the pregnancy and was present during the birth of my daughter will stay in my heart forever.
She birthed a new version of myself: becoming a mother.
She told me I could do it when I thought I couldn’t. She empowered me and taught me a lesson which helped me many years afterwards.
Thank you for all the midwives. Bless you all.
Letting go as children grow is an invitation to parent our children with integrity. Our actions matter so much more than our words. Also, our children need to feel that they belong. Then discipline comes naturally. Lastly, Deborah Jackson emphasizes the importance of self-care for mothers. I cannot agree more. I love her books so much my friend, my sister. Letting go as children grow has been on my book shelf for over 10 years and I reread it often, as my children grew.
I also love the book Three in a bed so much. It changed the way I took care of my newborn babies and parented my children.
I was helped by stories more than books when it came to prepare for a homebirth. Reading birth stories from real women was so empowering and inspiring. I am a huge fan of the website called Mothering.
I have a playlist dedicated to home birth available for you, “Homebirth Series“.
Let’s learn step by step how to tie a wrap baby carrier to carry baby on the back. My beautiful wrap comes from the gorgeous online store Wrapsody baby.
I choose sincerity. Sometimes I admit to my children that I am annoyed because they can play and I have chores to do. I also truly love working, so I say it to them as well. My point is not to sacrifice my happiness for their sake, as some people are trying me to do. Moreover my happiness is not contradictory to their joy and well-being. Some people value never moving places for the sake of the children for instance. Others think it is best to not get a divorce even when the relationship is failing, for the sake of the children.
I do not want my children to bear the burden of guilt. I am doing the best to provide for them and raise them as best as I can while following my joy.
Getting rid of emotions which no longer serve us, forgiving people who hurt us, making peace with our past, all of the above is required to our well-being and to the happiness of our children as well. Hence, the aim is to avoid projecting onto our children emotions which do not belong to them.
It is the story of the baby who cried in silence. It is the story of the premature baby who had a heart so big that he could feel my sadness, even when my tears fell without making a sound.