My dear blender burnt in a house fire. I loved smoothies so much, yet there is a good thing is that. I now create amazing and beautiful delicious raw vegan salads that I add on my Instagram to inspire you, notably the abundance salad, the contrasts salad and the black and white salad.
Finding the good thing in every situation is an exercise I love doing with my children.
As I was enjoying following the great Kate Magic on Instagram (she went to Bali last winter), I saw she was happy to be home in the UK after a beautiful travel experience in Indonesia.
Personally I wonder if I can call somewhere “home”. However what I know for sure is that I feel at home very rapidly when I am somewhere new. As some people accuse me of uprooting my children by moving abroad, I contemplate how open-mindedness is an underestimated quality. Having the skill to adjust and adapt is worth it. Choosing self-sacrifice to make sure our kids are raised in the same place during their entire childhood does not feel right. Belonging and feeling secure relate to knowing we are loved and safe. Whenever we go, I create the best loving environment I can for my children. What is your experience? Did you move abroad when you were a child?
Talking about sexuality to our children without taboo allows them to dedramatize the subject while protecting them. Hence, to be informed is the first step to make conscious and smart choices. Yes, I want my daughter to be cautious and intelligent when it comes to sexuality. At the same time, I do not want to stay silent as regard to the beauty of what sexuality can be, with the right partner. My aim is that my daughter become a self-confident woman, delighted to be in the skin she is.
I love the book (French edition) “Parler du vagin à ma fille” or How to talk about vagina to my daughter, because it is clear, honest, without taboo. Written by an OB-GYN, it contains all the important and necessary information, like hygiene, sexual transmitted diseases, pleasure and contraception. The book is written like a dialogue between the author and her 20-year-old daughter. The beginning of the book offers lots of historical data as regard to the place of women in medicine in general, then more precisely as midwives then OB-GYN. Thank you Catherine Rinieri for this open-hearted book. It is the second time I read it, safe for the fact that today I have an extraordinary teenage daughter next to me. I cannot find a better time to start tackling the topic of sexuality, with kindness, simplicity and truth.
Please share if you know similar books in English!
I choose sincerity. Sometimes I admit to my children that I am annoyed because they can play and I have chores to do. I also truly love working, so I say it to them as well. My point is not to sacrifice my happiness for their sake, as some people are trying me to do. Moreover my happiness is not contradictory to their joy and well-being. Some people value never moving places for the sake of the children for instance. Others think it is best to not get a divorce even when the relationship is failing, for the sake of the children.
I do not want my children to bear the burden of guilt. I am doing the best to provide for them and raise them as best as I can while following my joy.
Getting rid of emotions which no longer serve us, forgiving people who hurt us, making peace with our past, all of the above is required to our well-being and to the happiness of our children as well. Hence, the aim is to avoid projecting onto our children emotions which do not belong to them.
It is the story of the baby who cried in silence. It is the story of the premature baby who had a heart so big that he could feel my sadness, even when my tears fell without making a sound.
Teenagers push our buttons. We have to face ourselves and are as vulnerable as they are. Despite appearances, they help us grow.
My daughter is a mirror. When she blames me for something, I learn to listen fully to what she says, instead of immediately reacting with anger or upset. I open myself to her with trust and kindness. Every day I create a stronger link with her, made of mutual trust. It is reassuring for me. She can lean on me. Thanks to her, I become a better version of myself, I evolve and get stronger as she gets stronger.
Sometimes I see my children as strangers I would be lucky to meet. Then I am in awe of their character and their intelligence. It means that being a single mother is almost a sacred mission, in any case a huge privilege.