Amanda is @theshamaniccoach and she graced me with her bubbling presence for an interview.
We talked about reclaiming our personal power over our womb, our vagina and our yoni.
Amanda has been through hell and has come out of it to get reborn. Today she helps women by facilitating women’s circles and retreats with lots of meditations.
In our interview together, she offered women pragmatic tips to help rebuild their life thanks to yoga, the decision the start feeling the emotions instead of stuffing them down and numbing ourselves, journaling, letting go and reconnecting to our inner child.
I loved her words about fear. Amanda explained that fear and courage go alongside anyway. We can be very brave in our life, despite the fear.
Lastly, Amanda shared such a beautiful definition of self love: self love is when you show up even when you feel you want to shut down, to show up when you want to numb yourself.
I did not expect this. I shared a little Insta story (@clairesamuelenglish) as usual, as I do several times a day.
I was talking about the fact that I was angry at me for getting attached to this man so much.
I was holding him in high regard but I was not sure about his intentions towards me.
I promised myself not to get too attached. I had been waiting for over a year for him to make the first move.
Then I completely fell in love with him. I cannot do things without giving it my all. I am intense, I am a fire, committed and serious.
I really loved him but the relationship ended very quickly.
@douceur.sauvage reacted to my story by saying: “This is not failure. You respected your heart by partly abandoning yourself to this man. It is magnificent and it is aligned with yourself“.
I was bewildered. I went from thinking I was a failure to I respected myself. What a relief! I never saw things that way.
The truth is, my heart had been waiting for this man for such a long time. It is only normal that I was in a hurry and getting attached because it was so good.
I don’t have to beat myself up anymore. I didn’t make a mistake. I followed what was good at this moment. I did my best.
It is thanks to the words of a woman that I went back standing up on my legs. This is for me the most beautiful definition of sisterhood: to raise each other up, to support each other so each one of us can shine as bright as possible. Thank you @douceur.sauvage.
In my story, I also shared that I didn’t stop loving him. I will never stop loving him.
My love is simply going to turn into a delicious memory, with alchemy.
You too my friend my sister, you can decide to let your heartbreak be transmuted so that it leaves your heart fully available for a man who is willing to be with you.
Mashed bananas, chosen ripe so they are rich in potassium, with powdered spirulina. Why? Because this nice dark green seaweed is really rich in iron, in protein too.
My recipe for our menstrual cycle has to be eaten alone because it makes the teeth dark green 😉
By practicing self-care during our periods, we can get out of them full of life energy.
According to the extraordinary book Wild power (the review of the book is here), menstruation is like winter, preceding a beautiful spring and maybe a coming back together with our man, happy and healthy thanks to delicious spirulina!
The fabric is extra soft and comfortable, without chemicals. I chose size 38 as my trousers size is S and it was perfect. You can choose colors but I took everything in black.
I use pants number 1 until midday then I switch to pants number 2. For the night I have the Power shorty.
I wash the periods pants by hand with cold water and olive oil Marseille soap [ERRATUM: never use soap, I did not read the instructions properly, thank God I have a smart daughter who pointed it out to me!]. Because I live in the South, the pants dry quickly under the sun.
I was totally shocked by the efficiency of the Fempo periods pants. I have to confess I have very few clothes and half of them is still in Tunisia where I have to go back to get half of my remaining stuff. Moreover, most of my clothes are white. So it is a real challenge to get my periods!
Honestly, no leaks. Even at night. No blood on my thighs. I use to have periods pads with wide sides so I was afraid but it was perfect.
During the day when we sometimes feel a lot of blood coming out at once, it is a bit worrying. I work from home so I can easily change, however it may be a bit tricky at the office. Maybe a third pair of pants would be great for the day, just to be sure we feel dry at all times.
A third pair of periods pants may also be a good investment if you suffer from heavy periods or blood clots (two things I no longer suffer from since I slowed down my work and improved my lifestyle).
I am absolutely in love with the Fempo periods pants and have only one regret: that I did not know them before!
I gave up tampons early because it is not worth to risk toxic shock syndrome. Plastic pads were disgusting to me. The Diva cup is great but not comfortable for me. I ended up using fabric out of respect for my intimacy. Cotton rather than plastic!
Thank you Fempo. Thank you my dear daughter for introducing this brand to me. Thank you also for the advertisement with women who are different from the usual Barbie doll clone. It is so fresh!
To overcome physical or emotional abuse is the fruit of a real process, which has to take the necessary time.
Each one of us has her own way to rebuild her life and there is no perfect way to do it. To be reborn from the ashes like a phenix is done according to our personality, our circumstances, opportunities too.
Thus, some useful therapies like hypnosis or tapping can be useful to deal with post-traumatic stress with some of us.
I poured my pain into a book like a catharsis (The Knot in the Spiral). Then slowly, I began to rebuild my own unique personality, my tastes, my pleasure to be a woman.
2. Foundation rules of life
I love to create, I am very passionate, I follow my heart as much as possible, but I love to own values on which to align my actions, as much as possible.
I see men as admirable and magnificent human beings, not objects to find comfort. Therefore I do not want to use them.
Sexuality means reciprocal love in my life. However I refuse to judge how others can have different values. If you read my book The Knot in the Spiral, you understand how tolerant and open-minded I am towards those who do not share my way of thinking.
3. Health and happiness
Sexuality is for me a way to sublimate the love I feel towards a man. It is as important in my life as living food, fresh air and sunlight.
Sex and healthy living are linked and it is a way to honor the other person.
Some men use techniques to respect women even more by holding their fluids to avoid pregnancy and raise the amount of pleasure in both partners. Watch the video “Sex and Spirituality! Sacred Sensuality and Prana” about that if you are interested.
Fasting allows me to enjoy food even more while sexual abstinence helps me to make sex sacred.
Some women wait before marriage before having sex and I totally respect that even though it is not my choice (see “Why I’m a 32-Year Old Virgin“).
I am waiting to experience what reciprocal love is before having sexual intercourse so in the meantime I save myself and my energy for the man who will share sacred sexuality.
I got my driving license right after coming back to France, feeling half-dead after escaping a very abusing relationship. For some reason, I sensed it would be one way of rebuilding my self-esteem and my life.
I never drive nor do I own a car. However today I feel I need the freedom of being able to go wherever I want and whenever. So I got two hours of driving lessons to brush up my skills.
The guy said I was a very good driver and did not need more than two hours even though I never drove once in 8 years.
I felt so empowered and happy. The little things my friend my sister, the little things…
I was invited for a first date. I had a gorgeous dress is powder pink. I even remember the café in the north of Paris, with a golden statue and magnificent stairs.
I thought I was so in love with this man, until he said to me: “I want you to be the mother of my children“. Ouch. A mother? Why not a wife first? A woman? Sensual and beautiful before being nurturing and soothing for children?
I never got the flame back for him. Maybe I was wrong, maybe I missed something. I do not think so at all anymore. Everything which is meant to be for me is drawn to me anyway, as the great @nataliethebeliever says on Instagram.
My mistake was to think I was not enough as a woman. My error was to think my value as a human being would be higher was I to be a mother.
A few years afterwards, it was so easy for the abuser to convince me that I would be a better person if I had children.
Today I have two amazing children and I don’t feel sorrow anymore about what happened.
However, I refuse to be a scruffy mother. I always wanted to be appreciated as a woman and still wish to experience this soon.
The crazy hectic life attached to my situation as a working mother raising her kids alone is trying to make me scruffy. The tiredness, the never-ending demands of the children…
Maybe this is why I was so touched when a neighbor gifted me clothes. I was a woman dressed in white clothes, in front of the big mirror of my bathroom. I sent photos to this woman. I was so grateful.
I know that by reclaiming my woman part, I can be a better mother as well to my children.