Whenever I experience so much sadness that it is as if my whole body is in pain, I look for one part of my body which is pain free.
Very often, I choose one finger. I feel how in this one finger, no pain is present.
This exercise can be done on a more subtle way.
What is good and positive in your life? However small, if you can find one little good thing in your life, focus on it. Let it be a support to feel better about yourself.
Let it grow as you focus on it. Let it be the starting point to a better life. Pain does not last my friend my sister. You deserve happiness and joy. Hang in there. Blessings.
It was late, I had wished the kids good night and was starting to peacefully fall asleep, when my intuition startled me.
I had to say one last thing to the children.
I sleep on the living room sofa next to their bedroom so it is easy to communicate from one bed to the other.
I asked them if they were still aware that I love them for ever, in the same way when they do mistakes and when they behave well.
The next morning I could feel my son feel lighter.
I am deeply convinced that children really do the very best they can.
Sometimes kids have a hard time putting themselves in a box like school and society want them to.
I feel in my heart how these reminders of unconditional love are important, even with children of 8 and 11 years old.
The emotional healing part interested me the most in this book.
There is a fabulous interview of Doctor Habib Sadeghi by Inspire Nation available here.
Feeling our emotions and self-care
The clarity cleanse is a book which teaches us to contain (be present with) our emotions, instead of suppressing them or being overwhelmed by them. I love the emphasis put on giving meaning to a traumatic experience. By processing what happens into our life, we avoid our body to be damaged by it and start showing it with disease. When Doctor Sadeghi writes that “our biography dictates our biology“, it is yet another reason to practice self-care. Moreover, self-care is generous, I am deeply convinced of this. Dr Sadeghi clearly states that “giving to ourselves first is one of the greatest gifts we could ever give to those we love“.
2. Flowing with change
Dr Sadeghi says that everything is changing, moving, so we are not stuck either. Our circumstances will change. It reminds be of buddhism.
3. Taking responsability for own emotional waste
I can also draw a parallel between The clarity cleanse and The four agreements when Dr Sadeghi explains that it is our responsability to process our emotional waste, instead of burdening other people with it.
I loved the exercise where we are invited to start a dialogue between our judgemental self and our authentic self, by asking open-ended questions about what bothers us in life. It is even advised to alternatively sit on two separate chairs to do this exercise.
4. Can you spot the lesson in this?
As I teach my children, in every bad thing we can find a good thing. In a more elaborate way, The clarity cleanse reads “in every negative experience there is vital information that will serve us by helping us learn and grow“. Understanding what lessons our circumstances teach us is a prerequisite to adopting a positive view about them.
5. Accepting what is
I can also find some similarity between The clarity cleanse and Byron Katie’ books (notably Loving what is) when Dr Sadeghi writes that the important thing is to accept what is. Therefore, may we accept pain as we accept joy, knowing things move and change.
6. Forgiveness starts with ourselves
Dr Sadeghi teaches us to forgive ourselves, for thinking we needed validation of others, for believing we were unworthy of love. This is such a valuable lesson.
7. Body and mind
The whole point of this book is to demonstrate how body and mind are connected. It goes against the French philosopher Descartes, who coined the idea of our mind being totally separated from our body.
8. Clarity is a journey
Seeking clarity is a life’s journey and it is not easy. It reminded of a great Teal Swan video called “Will Healing Ever End? – Teal Swan“. Nevertheless, this ongoing process does not mean in any way we are broken sister.
Clarity raises our oxytocin levels, the love hormone, the more we put effort into it. Persistence, patience and consistency are key words here. It leads to faith, knowing our desires will come to fruition even though we do not know how yet, then the manifestation of our desires.
Clarity also mean doing some spring cleaning into our relationships. I personally experienced the relief letting go of toxic people brings.
9. What is lack of clarity?
Lacking clarity means having preconceived judgements, misinterpretations or limiting beliefs. They make reality cloudy.
At the end of The clarity cleanse, there is a list of definitions. I can relate to the one about emotional posturing. As I explain in my book The knot in the spiral this is exactly what kept me trapped into an abusive relationship for so long. This is the definition: “repressing our emotions by pretending our lives or our situations are different/better than they actually are“.
10. Clarity in our plate
The first detox diet of The clarity cleanse is a mix of sardines, brown rice and apples. I adapted this diet for a 5 day cleanse with apples as monomeals and lemon water. I do not want to go back to eating cooked food, because switching to raw changed my life in so many positive ways. It would feel very bad, because being 100% raw is an achievement for me. I cannot wait for The clarity cleanse to be adapted to us raw foodists. However, I tried to eat only apples, sprouts, seaweed and olive oil for a day and it was a disaster. I am sure it could go very well for you, but personally I am not a big fan of apples and hated it. I had two cups of hemps seeds, maca powder and cacao nibs and it felt like coming alive again. Please keep in mind this is very personal. My goal is to be honest with you on this point. You may love the detox diet and find great results afterwards.
Read more
I love the list of recommended books at the end. Very inspiring.
Shadow work does not mean that religion has nothing to do with it. If you belong to a religion sister, know that the priest Jean Monbourquette wrote an excellent book about getting to know and to love our repressed emotions.
My friend, my sister, feel free to share with the community the references of any book you feel is helpful to associate shadow work with other religions, and help other women. Thank you.
As a woman suddenly screamed in the bus, I was reminded of my dear mother. She was imprevisible. She could remove her love and support in a second. I spent my whole childhood walking on egg shells, wondering what I did wrong.
I am still working on overcoming fear of lack. It happens every day. For instance, I can spot how disproportionate my reaction can be and then make amends, start over, heal myself.
My first love (who I loved for 13 years as I write in my book The Knot in the Spiral) used to say to me that difficulty in human relationships come from the fact that each one of us live the same event in a different way. This is why we fight, don’t we? Not understanding each other is what makes us suffer.
Today I realize how jealousy between brothers and sisters can still be alive more than 10 years after the birth of a new baby. I chose to have even more compassion for my children.
Negative critics from other people reflect how they feel inside. Of course, a resentful and envious person will naturally be more critical of others than a happy human being. Moreover, how we look on the outside cannot tell everything about our life. Whenever someone chooses to use our external aspect to criticize ourselves, it has nothing to do with us.
The more I grow, the more I learn to deal with negative people in that way. Additionally, I am always stunned to witness hate towards wealthy people. I learned that badmouthing rich people attracts even more poverty. Attracting abundance into our life requires to have respect towards and to be happy for people who succeed and are wealthy. Then, abundance can flow into our life as well.
