I enjoyed interviewing Nathalie @mes_merveilleuses_fragilites on IG, author of a book to be released soon about her experience as a sophrologist to be in Tunisia.
We both share a deep love for this country, which we consider like a kind mother.
We also both experienced going back to studying as a way of rebuilding our life.
Last passion we share is minimalism, but happy freeing minimalism!
As regard to self-care, Nathalie grants meditation the power to make us feel at home wherever we are.
Home can be somewhere near the sea, even if it is not familiar (yet). We both attribute magical loving properties to the sea.
Our past can be difficult. However, Nathalie explained that once the harship is over, then we can understand the message it held for us.
Furthermore, plantbased and living foods were discussed as a way of practicing self-care. Clean nutrition is also a great way to feel energized and make the impossible possible.
Lastly, however strong people can judge us as regard to our accomplishments, we still need love. Always. In this regard, I was so touched when I heard Gabby Bernstein admits she still suffer sometimes in the video “Gabby Bernstein on CreativeLive | Chase Jarvis LIVE | ChaseJarvis“. We are all humans sister.
“As a woman you are coded for power“. Wow! Wild power is a book you cannot forget.
Wild power introduces you to “the inner powers of the menstrual cycle, and how to work with it as an inner guide and a tool for creating wellbeing“. Now this is women empowerment!
The “power of cyclical consciousness” lies in aligning our way of behaving and creating with the key phases of our cycle. The goal is to organize our life around our moon, our own rhythm.
Alexandra Pope has very interesting key concepts in her book Wild Power.
First, the Inner Seasons of the cycle are the phases of menstruation, pre-ovulation, ovulation and the premenstruum.
Second, the Two Vias (two ways of doing and being) are “the two currents of energy within the menstrual cycle“: expansion of energy from menstruation to ovulation or the Masculine Way (the via positiva) and contraction of energy from ovulation to menstruation or the Feminine Way (the via negativa). While ovulation relates to our place within the world, menstruation tackles our divinity inside. I see them as two poles within us. Maybe this is why women are more of a cyclical nature, contrary to the linear way of men (and society).
Third, the Five Chambers of Menstruation are Separation, Surrender, Renewal, Visioning, Clarity and Direction. Every woman is different of course, but the Five Chambers are roughly the five days of menstruation.
By separating ourselves from the world, going inside and resting, we surrender and regenerate our body. Thus comes the vision of our purpose, cleverly followed by practical guidance from our intuition about what to do next. Wild Power means that thanks to our moon, you can “receive a vision or monthly download for your life’s direction“. How revolutionary! Everything makes sense. During the via positiva, we plant seeds and we take action. During the via negativa, we gently slow down and reap the benefits. Each monthly period can open our mind to new ideas and insights, if we allow it by slowing the pace.
I thought it very interesting that Alexandra Pope wrote: “the collective power of women coming together can birth something quite original that can’t be easily known or accessed on our own. Patriarchy understood this perfectly, and the two ways it managed to control women were to separate us from each other and vilify, demonize and stamp out our ways and practices.” Is this why the #witch is always an ugly old woman in children’s books? To ridicule women who know how herbs and plants work for instance?
However, far from angry feminism, Wild Power aims at creating more harmonious relationships between men and women thanks to the return of such an ancient knowledge.
As regards to PMS, I understood that experiencing pain is the result of believing we can keep going 24/7. Indeed, “the cycle itself isn’t the problem; instead, it’s revealing a problem.”
I wish I knew it in my 20s when I was popping painkillers every month: “Much of what we label PMS is a sign that you’re run down.” Therefore, reducing our stress levels will reduce the painful symptoms by soothing the nervous system. “Rest is the revolution that’s going to power your life, and menstruation is The Ultimate Time for getting it.” Talk about a sacred task! I never thought of rest in this way. Resting to connect to the inner guidance. How beautiful.
Indeed, this is crucial because of the very nature of menstruation which is “the time to abandon all responsibilities and do nothing. There is some power in allowing ourselves to do nothing for a change. It’s the moment for rest, repair and renewal“. It’s also a way of modelling self-care for our daughters so we give them permission to slow down during their moon.
Menopause is another fascinating subject, because I have the deep intuition that it means so much more than society has made us believe. According to Alexandra Pope, menopause is when a woman becomes “the full revelation of [her] Wild Power in service of the World“.
My friend my sister, would you be interested in an interview about menopause with a lovely guest for instance? Let me know! Meanwhile, enjoy the great book Wild Power by Alexandra Pope.
Christine Singer words are an invitation to carry out the projects which resonate deeply in us, even if they seem crazy to others.
If we carry on long enough, they will not seem so foolish anymore. The secret is perseverance.
Writing The Knot in the Spiral or going to live in Tunisia with the children by leaving Paris seemed crazy.
However, these two beautiful endeavors have been created step by step, like any project.
Moreover, we are invited to let go of other people’s judgement.
Each one of us has his own way to evaluate craziness or reasonable.
When one person sees crazy, another one can see reason. Especially if we shift our perspective.
Thus, going to live in Tunisia, Africa allowed me to fulfill my dreams and even more, while taking care of my health and my children.
Go towards your dreams step by step my friend my sister.
2. No regrets over heartbreak
Christine Singer brings me so much comfort when she writes that the only thing that matters in the end is to have loved.
Even if I loved unavailable men, even if the beautiful love story never happened int he end, I did love.
May we let go of regrets my friend my sister. A heartbreak is better than a constricted heart.
3. Knowing where we are running towards
One positive side effect of meditation lies in the pure silence, or the taste of eternity that we offers our body and our soul.
We could then ask ourselves towards what we are rushing.
Our life could be altered by these simple words: Where are you running like that?
Sometimes it is wise to take a break and look around where we are. Sometimes is it worth listening to the silence, so that our little voice inside can be heard at last.
This life, this game, this movie and this adventure: why?
One night, around 11 pm, I asked myself if it was worth editing yet another contract, as my eyes were hurting like crazy.
I asked myself if rushing around all day was truly the best thing to be a good mother to my children.
What about you my friend my sister? Where are you running?
4. Permission to fail
We feel like creating something new then we take action steps.
Then, bam, something goes wrong or we made a mistake. However, falling or making a mistake shall not mean that the adventure reached the end. It is possible to choose another path.
Christine Singer softly reminds us that even feeling lost is part of being on a path.
May we let go of perfection because nobody expects perfection from us, only stepping closer to the light with each step.
5. Opening our mind
Christine Singer writes that religions as well as quantum physics taught us that one part of the universe lies inside the person who observes the universe.
Not only are we far more powerful than we imagine to modify our circumstances, but the very way to evaluate our current life can change it.
Is it an invitation for cultivating gratitude? What do you think my friend my sister?
6. Responsibility and interdependence
The environment is one way of demonstrating the interconnectedness between humans. If I mindlessly throw away a plastic bottle, someone else can see it on a beach in another country, as if the state of planet earth depended upon each one of us.
A strong invisible link ties us together through responsibility. Christine Singer sadly describes that we humans have not realized yet how interconnected we are.
I cannot pretend child labor does not exist when I buy a cheap plastic object.
I am moved when I read Christine Singer writing that the judge inside her of her sisters and brothers is dead. So you are me and I am you, and all this time I had the false belief that we are separate.
I have not found yet the solution and am not perfect, but I am responsible for my actions and their consequences on my fellow humans.
7. Inviting change into our life
In the past, I wanted to control and plan everything. I was desperate when something did not go the way it was supposed to.
Today I keep in mind how the river gracefully flows, moves and changes.
I welcome change like a soft wind. Refusing to allow for flexibility can hurt. Swimming with the stream is much easier.
Christine Singer describes life as a never-ending update, a permanent change which gets rid of everything that tries to keep things stuck on one way.
Moreover, if change comes from the outside, we can also initiate it in our life.
We are never really stuck in some uncomfortable situation. Renewal is not out of reach. It is as if we were locked into a prison, but from the inside the lock can be open.
8. For humility in listening to others
We never know. Each action we choose can open or close a door. Each word uttered by a stranger can change our life.
I learned so much from people who were very different from I am, much younger than me or with far more or far less diplomas than I have.
Keeping a curious ear can open us the door to the extraordinary.
Whenever we listen to our heart and our intuition, whenever we take in the words of another fellow human without getting attached to his/her look, then the invisible can magically be revealed to us.
We all belong to one big family. Each one of us has a treasure inside. Every human being can teach us something. This is where lies true humility.
9. In celebration of the divine feminine
Since I live in Tunisia, I am grateful that I am not walking in subway corridors surrounded by women body parts anymore.
Christine Singer describes how these gorgeous women become insignificant advertisement support.
I love the grace and the exquisite beauty of the feminine body. I love when the divine feminine is honored and celebrated, not used as an object.
My wish for women and girls is that they are proud of their beautiful body, not that they compare themselves to the false photoshopped faces of advertisement.
10. For a peaceful ascension
I am vegan, but I have nothing bad to say to meat eaters. Who am I to judge? One part of this big family we all belong to, nothing less and nothing more.
Judging others shall not help the world to bask in light. When we fix our gaze for too long on the thing we want to fight against, we become this thing (Mircea Eliade). May we also take care not to impose our version of goodness to others who may have a different one.
Perhaps one way would be to adopt a behavior similar to the parent in positive education of children?
I do not wat to judge nor to preach, but I want to embody the values which are close to my heart.
I do not want to combat or claim, but shine light on the possibility of choosing another path.
Christine Singer writes that we complain about the poor quality of our food or the air around us, while such anger creates even more poison into our body.
Therefore, may we focus instead of opening our mind. May we strive to work for a better world by creating it ourselves, step by step.
I feel that sharing our experience together is a good way to start helping each other my friend my sister.
The Empowered Woman is a book I did not want to finish reading because I loved it like a delicious dish.
The sub-title is “A Holistic Guide to Understanding Your Hormones“. Had it not have been written by Kate Magic, who I admire so much, I would not have picked up this book because I am not particularly interested in hormones.
However, Kate Magic makes learning about hormones fun and interesting. Thanks to the book The Empowered Woman, I expanded my knowledge so much about what the feminine and masculine hormones are and how they interact with each other all the time.
Please find below 10 reasons why I adore Kate Magic’ new book.
We are entering a new age, not where we reject men but where we integrate in a harmonious way the divine masculine with the divine feminine.
2. Inside and outside
Kate Magic writes: “Empowerment is knowing that everything that happens in your life is ultimately a reflection of your inner state“.
Enough said. May we carry on working on ourselves to get the life we deserve.
3. Socrates again
Again and again in my recent readings, I come across the famous injunction from Socrates: “Know thyself“.
Kate Magic reminds us that knowing ourselves first is also the greatest gift, from ourselves to ourselves.
Today I do not feel like pleasing people around me anymore, but discovering who I really am.
4. Of the importance of food
Before transitioning slowly from a standard diet to a raw vegan lifestyle, I was absolutely not aware of the direct connection between what we eat and our state of mind.
Today it would be impossible for me to eat an animal for instance. I would not want to make her pain and suffering mine by eating it.
Our personal power also lies in the food we chose to eat (or not).
5. Epigenetics?
I discovered epigenetics a few years ago. It is a new way of looking at genes. In her book The Empowered Woman, Kate Magic invites us to free ourselves from the weight of our genetic past.
Our genes can be modified if we chose a healthier lifestyle. It starts by changing our habits.
We can become freer and create our life.
6. Habits or choices?
Changing our life starts with changing our habits. Instead of going through the motion like a robot, I can choose to ask myself: “Why am I doing this all the time?“.
Changing our habits also means introducing new ones. When I made the decision to practice yoga 5 minutes every day, I was far from imagining that one day I would do at least 30 minutes of yoga so easily.
A conscious habit becomes a choice and can lead us very far.
7. Stress no more baby
Being an empowered woman is being aware that stress is the worst.
No amount of good nutrition and regular exercise can help if we are stressed out. Most stress comes from a bad attitude towards ourselves. On the contrary, practicing self-care lowers our cortisol levels. As women, we are more likely to feel it because the whole society is organized in a linear and detrimental way for us, in opposition to our feminine nature, which is cyclical, intuitive and thrives on collaboration.
I learned it the hard way. I was raw vegan and practicing yoga every day, but working like crazy in a law firm. I simply burned out. Before changing my life.
I moved from France to Tunisia to lower my exposure to daily stress.
If you current situation is poisoned by stress, please know you are not alone. In her book, Kate Magic shares how she almost went into a nervous breakdown more than once.
8. Boundaries and disappointing people
The Empowered Woman is yet another invitation to set boundaries for ourselves. It starts by saying no more often.
By saying no to others we say yes to ourselves.
Learning to disappoint people and feel alright was one of my biggest lessons. I share about it in my book The Knot in the Spiral.
9. The bliss principle
Kate Magic reminds us in her book that we are meant to experience bliss in our life. We are worth it no matter what.
Following our bliss puts us in a good spiral of getting more joy and happiness. You know I love positive spirals 😉
10. Of potential and leave or our relationships with men
The most common error women make is to only see in a man the potential he holds. Loving a man is not changing him nor helping him to become different from what he is now.
Knowing how to walk away is one key of our personal power.
Lastly, a man’s role is not to make us happy. Being empowered and willing to share our happiness is much more gratifying for both people involved.
1. Conscious uncoupling is a real treat for personal development lovers, even if we are not currently breaking up with a partner.
2. Katherine Woodward Thomas’ book about parting ways in a loving manner is full of practical and useful tips.
For instance, I love her advice as regard to feeling overwhelmed by a separation.
Sometimes, having a broken heart means we behave in an irrational and erratic way.
What is the solution to come back to our wise and usual self? By identifying our emotions.
Giving a name to the feelings which overwhelm us brings awareness. This is the first step to center ourselves again.
3. Concious uncoupling also means searching inside of ourselves for the original core wound.
What happened in the past that hurt us so much that we are reliving that event again and again everytime we experience a break-up?
Again, by identifying the buried trauma, we can let it go, free ourselves from it and grow happier and healthier.
4. What if repeating a smart mantra could help coming out of the intense sadness brought by the loss of a partner?
A mantra is a kind of intelligent alchemy. It has the power to transform our inner state.
Repeating a mantra means we connect with our adult self, the one who is resourceful and wise.
A positive mantra brings good vibes into our life. It supports a healthy intention. It allows us to stop acting like the terrified child who is inside us and is so frightened that she makes us act in a crazy way. We can reassure this child with a soothing mantra.
My favorite mantra at the moment is: “I have everything I need and more”.
5. A concious breakup means we take back our personal power instead of blaming and criticizing our ex.
Instead of taking on the victim role, we have the power to choose differently. We can look for the mistakes we made in the relationship. We can grow from there, promising not to repeat them in the future.
If we are able to identify where we misjudged situations, we can build a healthier relationship the next time.
In my book, The Knot in the Spiral, I share how I deeply loved a man for 13 years. The question for me would be: “Why did I choose to fall in love with a man who was unavailable and for such a long period of time?”
6. To forgive ourselves is part of the process of positive uncoupling and freedom. May we forgive ourselves first, before forgiving our ex.
I make a concious effort to forgive myself for having misused positive thinking, hoping the abuser would change and minimizing the abuse by focusing on the good sides of my existence (like having hot water at the tap).
7. Concious uncoupling is a book which invites us to honor the time spent with our ex.
The aim is not to make the past better-looking than it was nor to stay in the past.
On the contrary, honoring the time spent together and the good times, despite the bad ones, is the key to close this chapter of our life with dignity and intelligence.
Each of us is then free and lighter to create a brighter future.
8. Acting with love when breaking up from someone does not mean that abuse is not a reality. If this is the case, the goal to keep in mind is to ensure safety first.
I wish that all this positive thinking applied to divorce is not another way for manipulative people to keep their victim under control. I described in my book The Knot in the Spiral how talented actors they are.
9. What is true love? What is the purest form of love? Why did Aristotle put friendship above erotic love? Who is this man who I called an “angel” in my book The Knot in the Spiral?
Pure love means wishing the other person all the happiness in the world. Without expecting anything in return. What if we could separate from someone wishing them so much happiness that we accept it if we are not part of their future life?
If we are the one being left, I believe such pure good wishes can support healing our broken heart.
10. Concious uncoupling is a book to make us grow in wisdom, but also in abundance.
May we not be fooled by long-lasting, costly and uncertain legal proceedings. We have the power to leave a relationship without such drama.
