You asked me what studies I did exactly and how to find the motivation, so here is my answer my friend my sister.
First I was always top of the class when I was at school, but not for the right reasons. I was a good pupil because I wanted to prove my value to others.
Second, I dropped off because I thought I was no good anymore at studying. I became a cashier in a frozen food store.
My life changed because of kind people around me. Never underestimate the impact you can have on another person’s life.
More about my story from self hate to self love in the book The Knot in the Spiral my friend my sister.